And how ridiculous my tendency to lose focus and faith is?
Ah, the Lord is teaching me alot about this sin in my heart.
I prayed and prayed and prayed for things, and after a long period of waiting for them and learning to trust God, he supplies all I need! YET in the middle of God faithfully providing for me, I oh so quickly turn my eyes off of God and on to me and my situations. Yes I say "Praise the Lord, He is faithful" but I realized that in my heart I started getting stressed out, mostly because somehow, somewhere in my heart I said "now I can take it from here". And from there I SOMEHOW begin to think about how great I am and that I was able to do all of these things and that I really don't need to make God number one in this season. Isn't this sick?
And yet, again, the Lord is SO faithful to remind me how weak I am. To remind me that HE is the ONLY reason I am where I am, and HE is the ONLY WAY I am going to make it through this next season. He reminded me of His unchanging grace, and how He will be there to guide me. And also how I need to rely on Him, and Him Alone and He will give me strength.
Wow. What a wake up call.
I am so amazed by God's gifts. But I am so ENTHRALLED with the giver of these gifts!
God is teaching me that He wants to be my all-in-all. And when I react to closed doors with "Hallelujah, ALLL I have is Christ" the Lord never ceases to provide.
Praise the Lord!
Thank you Lord for your amazing gifts and for answering my prayers! But Lord thank you even more for how you gently take my eyes off of myself and fix them back on you. Thank you for using people and situations and your very WORD to draw my heart back to you, time and time again. I want you to be ALL I'm living for! Oh Jesus, please be my all...
